You hear and read this statement all the time, 'parenting 10, 20, 30 years ago is different to how parenting is today'. Raising children evolves as the parenting land scape changes. It needs to to keep up, to assimilate to the rapid changes in society, technology, parenting methods ... everything.
I had a conversation with an older parent and the topic of parenting sacrificing came about. I sat there, listened and was semi lectured on the differences between how they sacrificed as parents in their day versus how parents of today sacrifice for their children. My parents taught me good manners and not to talk back to elders, so of course I bit my tongue and listening to her make judgements on the parents of today.
Well she doesn't have a blog does she? So I'm going to rant on here the points I would've said to her hadn't I not been so ... polite ...
- You spoke about sacrifices you made to give your children what (you thought) they valued, but really those things weren't that important to them. You were too tunnel vision in what you thought would make them happy. What kids want isn't that hard, all they really want is for their parents to be there.
- You're such a snob about particular areas and demographics but you were once of them too. You know, working class. It's because of your history and background you're able to have what you have now.
- Just because I'm not working doesn't mean I'm not making sacrifices. I'm not at home relaxing all day, doing nothing. I had career aspirations, dreams I've had to put on hold. As you would know as a mother, you're the one always making sacrifices for your family. We just value different things, therefore have different definition of what sacrifice is.
- Parenting 20 years ago you guys shipped family over to help you raise your kids and probably didn't pay them for their assistance. Today we don't want to burden our parents or family with the full responsibility of looking after our children, so we send our kids to expensive childcare centres. A cost that you probably didn't have to factor when you were raising children, on top of other financial commitments.
- Don't assume all Gen-Y's just spend all their disposable income on material things .... I can assure you I am / my family are an exception. The fact that I am at home is no accident. It has been a financially calculated decision.
- Lastly I don't understand why you're complaining when the whole purpose of what you did during your parenting days was so your children could live a little bit more comfortably than you did. They are. You achieved what you were working so hard and hoping to see happen one day, so why does it bother you so much?
Argh!! ... I just had to get that out ...
I could feel my blood boiling during that conversation and I knew even if I did try and explain things to this person they wouldn't see past their own opinions. Cause that's old people for you ...
What comments do you hate hearing about parenting of parents today?
